Tag Archives: Compassion

Ep92 Encore: The Myth of Self-Esteem

April 25, 2023UncategorizedAccomplishments, Bullying, California School, Commitments, Compassion, Compliments, Failure, Fake Self-Esteem, Praise, Religion, Responsibility, Self Compassion, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Shame, Social Comparisonwrestlingwithgodshow

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 23:43 — 21.7MB)

Father Len exposes the dangerous effects of trying to boost self-esteem with excessive or false praise and compliments.

Support Wrestling with God Productions: https://www.GiveSendGo.com/WWGProductions

Highlights, Ideas, and Wisdom.

“Self-esteem is like a four letter cuss word that when you say it you need to wash your mouth out” – Father Len
Father Len illustrates the negative effects of self-esteem by sharing the story of his encounter with a young man and his big dog during his quest to rid the church grounds of dog poop.
Our current culture promotes a competition to become the greatest victim.
Religion is about becoming a better person, not making you feel good about yourself.
Religion is about being in a relationship with God and others built upon the virtues of love, compassion, and justice.
People with self-compassion gain grit and determination and are more likely to pick themselves up after a failure and try again.
Attempts to boost self-esteem with excessive or false praise and compliments produces fake self-esteem that rejects critical or negative feedback capable of producing personal growth and success.
Fake self-esteem based solely on feelings of “I’m special and smart and beautiful and people love me” is fragile and produces social comparison and constant anxiety.
Kids become bullies to boost their own self-esteem.
Fake self-esteem prepares you to become a victim.
Real self-esteem based on achievements and making and keeping commitments is important for emotional and spiritual health.
Real self-esteem embraces failure and believes everyone can improve.

We welcome your questions and comments:

Email: irish@wwgproductions.org
Text or voicemail: 208-391-3738

Links to Podcasts from Wrestling with God Productions

Wrestling with God Show: http://WWGShow.com
Life Lessons from Jesus and the Church He Founded: http://LifeLessonsfromJesus.org
A Priest’s Life: https://idahovocations.com/resources/video-podcasts/

Ep67 The Myth of Self-Esteem

August 19, 2021UncategorizedAccomplishments, Bullying, Commitments, Compassion, Failure, Lake Coeur d’Alene, Religion, Responsibility, Self Compassion, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Shame, Social Comparisonwrestlingwithgodshow

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 22:22 — 20.5MB)

Father Len exposes the dangerous effects of trying to boost self-esteem with excessive or false praise and compliments.

Support Wrestling with God Productions: https://www.GiveSendGo.com/WWGProductions

Highlights, Ideas, and Wisdom.

“Self-esteem is like a four-letter cuss word that when you say it you need to wash your mouth out” – Father Len
Father Len illustrates the negative effects of self-esteem by sharing the story of his encounter with a young man and his big dog during his quest to rid the church grounds of dog poop.
Our current culture promotes a competition to become the greatest victim.
Religion is about becoming a better person, not making you feel good about yourself.
Religion is about being in a relationship with God and others built upon the virtues of love, compassion, and justice.
People with self-compassion gain grit and determination and are more likely to pick themselves up after a failure and try again.
Attempts to boost self-esteem with excessive or false praise and compliments produces fake self-esteem that rejects critical or negative feedback capable of producing personal growth and success.
Fake self-esteem based solely on feelings of “I’m special and smart and beautiful and people love me” is fragile and produces social comparison and constant anxiety.
Kids become bullies to boost their own self-esteem.
Fake self-esteem prepares you to become a victim.
Real self-esteem based on achievements and making and keeping commitments is important for emotional and spiritual health.
Real self-esteem embraces failure and believes everyone can improve.

We welcome your questions and comments:

Email: irish@wwgproductions.org
Text or voicemail: 208-391-3738

Links to Podcasts from Wrestling with God Productions

Wrestling with God Show: http://WWGShow.com
Life Lessons from Jesus and the Church He Founded: http://LifeLessonsfromJesus.org
A Priest’s Life: https://idahovocations.com/resources/video-podcasts/

Ep66 Curing Shame

August 3, 2021UncategorizedAct of Contrition, Compassion, Confession, Determination, Gratitude, Grit, Guilt, Holy Spirit, Idaho, Jesus, Lake Coeur d’Alene, Liturgy of the Hours, Magnificat, Maya Angelou, Me Too Movement, Narcissist, Oprah Winfrey, Self Compassion, Self-Criticism, Shame, St Ignatius, Tarana Burke, The Shemawrestlingwithgodshow

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 29:38 — 27.1MB)

Father Len shares his favorite method for the difficult and necessary job of curing shame.

Highlights, Ideas, and Wisdom

Shame can control you and make your life and the lives of those around you miserable.
Shame is that voice inside your head that constantly tells you that you are worthless.
Self-esteem programs are not effective for curing shame.
You have to learn how to love yourself in order to cure shame.
The practice of self-compassion is the antidote to shame.
Father Len introduces his version of the St. Ignatius Daily Examen that he uses and recommends to cultivate self-compassion and conquer shame.
People who are controlled by shame are usually less compassionate.
People who are able to change the shaming voices in their heads are more likely to develop grit and determination and overcome failures.
Father Len demonstrates how he used the St. Ignatius Daily Examen to avoid shame and produce self-compassion and personal growth after being a “jerk” to a homeless man and his dog.
Father Len tells the story of Oprah Winfrey using a daily gratitude journal to help overcome the shame of being raped, having a child out of wedlock and to learn that it’s the simple things in life, not her money, that bring her joy.
“I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” by Maya Angelou
“What I Know for Sure” by Oprah Winfrey
You can pray as much as you want, but it will be hard to hear the voice of the Holy Spirit if the loud voices of shame are playing in your head.
Shame is connected with low grade physical pain.
If you are controlled by shame, every failure reminds you what a piece of trash you are.
If you are controlled by self-compassion, every failure says I’m going to get better and better.

Ep59 Understanding the Language of God

April 26, 2021UncategorizedBook of Leviticus, Christ, Compassion, CS Lewis, Cupid, Dan Savage, Ego, God, Jesus, Jews, Justice, Love, Moral Relativism, Morality, Pharisees, slavery, St Paul, St. Faustina, The Biblewrestlingwithgodshow

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 22:03 — 20.2MB)

Responding to a listener’s question about whether God’s teachings are black and white, Father Len explains why it’s difficult for us to fully understand the language of God’s love.

Highlights, Ideas and Wisdom

God’s morality and teachings are black and white and pure because God is love, without ego and without corruption.
Our interpretation of God’s morality and teachings is often wrong because it is viewed through the prisms of our egos and agendas.
Father Len illustrates the dangers of interpreting God’s word through ego by pointing out how wrong the Jews were in their interpretations of the Bible’s prophecies about Christ’s purpose on earth.
Jesus interprets morality and laws from the perspective of love.
Father Len points out that Jesus welcomed prostitutes and adulterers in his life knowing that prostitution and adultery are wrong because that’s what love does.
Love perfects us.
The Bible tells us that anyone who does not love and proclaims that they know God is a liar.
Our black and white view of morality often errs on the side of being harsh and judgmental, void of love.
Black and white morality can be very seductive because we can proclaim it to be justice, but without compassion it can be very wrong.
There are two kinds of moral extremes: black and white and relativism. Both are based a lot on ego.
Moral relativism is morality based solely on personal feelings and choice usually driven by ego or agenda.
Reacting to immoral behavior with love forces us to have empathy and compassion.
Father Len uses the Bible’s various perspectives on slavery to illustrate how God is constantly trying to help us evolve in our morality understanding we can’t always accept the whole truth all at once.
Fully understanding God’s language of love and morality is a lifelong process.