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Father Len explains what forgiveness is and isn’t and the powerful positive effects it has on us and those around us.
Highlights, Ideas, and Wisdom
- We live in an age of anger. It defines our politics, the way we drive, our Facebook posts, and even our religion.
- A lot of religious people baptize anger and make excuses for it by calling it righteous.
- Nowhere in the Bible does it mention God’s having righteous anger. There is no righteous anger. Anger is anger.
- There is a joke about Irish Alzheimer’s. It’s when you forget everything, but those you’re mad at.
- People often confuse forgiveness with reconciliation. Forgiveness doesn’t require reconciliation.
- Everything is forgivable, but not all things can be reconciled.
- Forgiveness means you’re not going to be trapped in a prison of anger, bitterness, and resentment. It’s a source of freedom.
- Attempts to reconcile with the sociopath can be problematic. An invitation to get hurt again and again.
- Forgiveness that skips over justice and doesn’t hold the offender accountable is fake forgiveness. Its amnesty and submission to the wrong. It turns forgiveness into the way of the weak and not the strong.
- Why should we forgive? First and foremost because God said so.
- Father Len describes how forgiveness gave Nelson Mandela freedom.
- Father Len tells the amazing story of a young actress whose career was ruined by Alfred Hitchcock, but she was able to forgive him and later attend his funeral free of anger, bitterness, and resentment.
- Bitterness has a long-term effect on the brain. It makes you dumber.
- Anger contributes to bad decision-making.
- Wounded people wound others. If you hold on to anger and a really deep hurt, you’re likely to hurt other people.
- Forgiveness silences the voice of the offender that keeps telling you you’re a victim and you have no dignity.
- Forgiveness contributes to better health and a longer life.
- Dr. Robert Enright’s “International Forgiveness Institute”
- “Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.” – CS Lewis
- The book, “A 1000 Acres” by Jane Smiley is a great story about the power of forgiveness.
- People who’ve been able to forgive a deep hurt have a much greater capacity to love.